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How to Smoke Weed Discreetly Around Your Family

If your family doesn’t share your enthusiasm for a little herbal indulgence, fighting the urge to smoke cannabis may prove difficult during holidays and other gatherings. Even if cannabis is legal where you are, it doesn’t mean your family has accepted it.

So, what’s a cannabis user to do when they have to spend long periods of time with their loved ones who are not so cannabis-friendly? We have compiled some useful tips and scent-free options to help you smoke weed discreetly around family while avoiding potential conflict and looks of dismay.

Scent-Free Options

The most obvious way to use cannabis discreetly is to go the scent-free route. There are low-odor strains available, but proceed with caution as the smell will still linger on the body and clothing. Consuming cannabis orally or applying it topically to the skin is the safest bet to kick the weed smell. If you’re picturing taking a bite out of a nugget or rubbing sticky buds all over your body, that’s not quite what we mean.

Edibles

The edibles market has blown up over the last few years. From gummies and chocolate to mints, cookies, and brownies, there are endless options of delicious ways to enjoy cannabis. Brands like Twisted Extracts and MOTA offer a wide range of cannabis-infused edibles with THC, CBD, or a nice little combo of the two.

Liquids

If you don’t want your grandma to spot your stash of special brownies, liquid options for cannabis are worth a shot. The go-to liquids tend to be tinctures and oils, but innovative products like drinks and honey sticks are starting to pop up everywhere.

Topicals

There are cannabis topicals in the form of transdermal patches, lotions, bath salts, balms, salves, and lubes. Cannabis topicals are locally applied on the skin and typically made with higher CBD concentrations, with little to no traces of THC. Transdermal patches, however, do offer a variety of isolated cannabinoids, making it one of the most discreet cannabis products out there.

Pro Tips:

  • A variety of factors impact the time it takes to feel the effects of cannabis, such as consumption method, body weight, metabolism, potency, and dosage.
  • People’s most common mistakes when taking edibles are taking too much or not waiting long enough for the first edible to kick in before taking another.
  • No matter which scent-free option you’re dabbling in, it’s always best to start low and slow. It may not sound sexy, but it allows you to gauge how a product interacts with your body before diving in with both feet.

Barely-Scented Alternatives

If you want to maintain a mild sense of danger and scent-free isn’t cutting it for you, vaporizers make smoking weed around family simple and discreet. There is a vaporizer for every kind of cannabis and social setting, from top-of-the-line vaporizer models to pens that you throw out when they’re out of juice.

Choosing the right vape is all about understanding your preferences and what you’re trying to get out of your vaping experience. Vape smoke is typically soft and muted, with options to inject a more pleasant aroma using flavored units for inconspicuous clouds that smell like strawberries or bubble gum.

Vape pens, one-hitters, and dry flower vaporizers are just a few of the travel-friendly options to smoke weed discreetly on-the-go. Vape pens come with liquid cannabis in cartridges, whereas dry herb vapes require you to grind your flower, put it in the chamber and smoke it using convection heat. One-hitters look like a cigarette, and although some are battery-operated, others don’t require any additional add-ons for a successful session. There are also disposable cannabis vape pens where you toss it out when you’re done instead of charging them.

Pro Tips:

  • Vaping dry herb or oils has less smell compared to combusting weed.
  • No matter what vaporizer you settle on, remember to give it a good scrub every few sessions, so every inhale can feel like the first.
  • Avoid vape oils that contain Vitamine E acetate and diacetyl. Both of these ingredients have been linked to lung injuries.

Getting Rid of the Weed Smell

In case your only option is smoking weed (whether joint, pipe, or water pipe), then let’s talk about some ways to rid yourself of the unmistakable odor.

Smokebuddy (The Blunt-in-a-Cup Method)
The Smokebuddy is a handy, portable air purifier that is shaped like a coffee cup or mug. It offers one of the most discreet ways to smoke weed without anyone noticing. Puff and blow the smoke inside the device, and it will purify and neutralize the scent.

Smoke Weed Discreetly Outside or Get Lots of Ventilation
It isn’t foolproof but opening a door or window to get lots of ventilation can reduce the smell of weed. However, smoke can often linger in the curtains, floors, and walls. Take your session outside if you can to further eliminate odors.

Air Purifiers
If you want to smoke indoors and you happen to come across an air purifier, turn it on—these work just as well as air fresheners and candles. The HEPA and ionizing filters work to neutralize the smell.

Take a Bath or Shower
Taking a long and nice bath can be an effective way to get rid of the herbal scent. However, if you can’t take a bath after every time you smoke, then make sure to wash your hands, brush your teeth, use a breath mint and, if possible, change into new clothes. You may want to come up with a good story when your family questions why you’re taking so many baths or frequently changing into different clothes. As George Costanza once said, it’s not a lie if you believe it.

Desktop Vaporizer or Pen? The Right Vape for Your Lifestyle

The ultimate guide to choosing your next vape adventure.

Need to be discreet smoking your herb around the family? Here a few time-honored tricks to get your high in an inconspicuous manner.

How to Smoke Weed Without the Smell

The question I get asked again and again, more than any other question, is some form of “how does your house not smell like cannabis??” From the house itself to my children’s school items, people want to know how I keep from stanking up everything.

When I was a newbie stoner I was semi-paranoid about the smell. I would often smoke weed in the car with the BFF, and when it was time to pull ourselves out of a hot-boxed car, we would spray ourselves with Victoria Secret Body Spray. (Which incidentally is the same trick I used in high school to hide my secret weed habit). BFF and I even have a patented technique for de-stinking ourselves before a dinner out. Spritz some hardcore fragrance on the car air vents and then blast the AC. Instant refreshment for the closeted stoner mom.

I have never been a person who a. wears any fragrance, or b. emits any extraordinary odors. After a few years of this whole being-a-stoner-thing, I have realized that my actual ‘person’, never smells. My stoner ways have matured into a more sophisticated set of rituals, respecting my health, home and beauty while still allowing me to medicate for my mental health.

Common Misconceptions

Because of my YouTube videos, there is a common misconception that I constantly exhale weed into my house. The reality is, I shoot videos when my children are gone for the entire weekend, or when they are gone for the entire day at school.

I plan to film my videos around my children, which is why there are times when I don’t upload. It’s because I won’t film when my kids are around, and sometimes things happen and they are around more than usual. So yeah, this idea that I am constantly smoking around the kids or house is really just dumb.

When kids are home, I never, ever, just blow smoke casually around the house. Stoner Mom fans have seen my trick of toking up in the kitchen and then exhaling out the back door while letting my insane dog in and out, all day long, as the stay-at-home-mom is wont to do. I only do this when the children are occupied in other parts of the home, and when there is little chance of them interrupting me. If my husband’s kids are home and he’s busy with them on other floors, I’ll sequester myself in my bedroom for my smoke sessions.

Common Sense

Keeping yourself and your home cannabis smoke-free is really just about common sense. Marijuana smoke isn’t some toxic substance that will coat your walls with yellow stains. It’s not tobacco for goodness sakes. Normal grooming and maintenance of the home should keep it smelling just fine. I wouldn’t advise lighting up right before company comes, but for most purposes, there is really no reason to avoid smoking marijuana in the home.

How to Smoke Weed Without the Smell

Here are five ways to keep your house and body stank free:

  1. Go outside
    I believe that my magical house would be a lot less magical if I made it a point to smoke weed and exhale in it several times a day. The safest way to keep your house stank free is to just step outside. Use the garage, a car park, the backyard, just let the smoke out elsewhere. My house is set up so that stepping outside and staying right by the door is super easy. Under extraordinary circumstances? Stand on the toilet and blow smoke out the window. Step into the garage to exhale, or keep the bong in the laundry room with the window open. No one hangs out in the laundry room.An often forgotten reason to blaze up outside, is that it’s just nicer! Weed was made for nature lovers. Give yourself five minutes of fresh air and fresh cannabis and watch your day dramatically improve.
  2. Air purifiers
    You can find affordable air purifiers at Wal-Mart, Target, Amazon, everywhere. They are cheap, easy to use, and they work. It’s one of those products where you can either spend a small amount or a buttload and still get an effective way to keep the air in your house clean and stank-free. Bonus points for houses with animals and kids with allergies. Air purifiers are a must for these families. Keep one in your main smoking area and more in the kids rooms. Smell proof house, with air constantly cycling through a filter. Done. This is the one I use, and it’s excellent. There are tons of options on the market, so try to opt for a mid cost one and invest in more than one unit.

3. Sploofy

The Sploofy is an amazing air filter made specifically for the purpose of discreet smoking! Small, discreet, and most importantly, it works! Simply exhale your smoke into the base of the Sploofy and watch all signs of your cannabis use disappear.

Get a Sploofy for yourself with my affiliate link: Sploofy!

4. Windows and ceiling fans
Just another method of going outside. Keep the air in your house constantly moving to get that cannabis smell out! Open windows, smoke near them, turn on ceiling fans, run swiftly around the circumference of the house, flapping your arms wildly. Fan that shit out!

5. Air freshening products
The store is full of many a choice for air fresheners. My personal favorites are the old school kinds made for dank basements. Citrus Magic is my favorite, as these little discs have their deodorizing skills on lockdown.

It is always preferred to remove stank rather than cover it up, so look for deodorizing products rather than perfuming products that just sit on top of the stank. Lysol is a classic deodorizer and it will make your house smell as clean as an insane asylum.

If you are looking for a natural room deodorizer, look no further than baking soda. Available in big bags for a couple of dollars, baking soda is the oldest form of de-stanking. Those orange boxes in the fridge are meant just for that purpose!

Sprinkle baking soda liberally on vacuumable surfaces where cannabis smoking takes places and vacuum up a few hours later. Also, consider keeping a pretty dish filled with baking soda in your stoner room.

Other Questions:

“What about the kids backpacks and jackets? Do they smell like weed?”

No! To accomplish this I believe I would have to literally smoke weed in an enclosed space, baking in the sun, and exhaling directly onto the children’s items. It just. Doesn’t. Happen.

If you share a very small enclosed space with your kids and their belongings, then yeah, don’t smoke weed in it. Kids stuff smells despite what you do to mitigate the smell? Throw a deodorizer in there. Unless you are storing your weed in your kid’s backpack, I see no reason why it should ever smell like anything other than uneaten tuna sandwiches.

“What about vaping? Why don’t you vape more when the kids are home?”

Again, there seems to be a misconception that my entire life is documented on YouTube. And it’s not. My videos are a tiny sample of my day-to-day life, so there is really no reason to assume that I don’t often vape.

Vaping is my number one recommended method for keeping a stank-free house. A healthier alternative overall, and odor free, it’s the type of thing you can do without having to worry about the kids at all. When vaping cannabis, the only thing exhaled is vapor, which is almost scent free, and does not have that distinctive “weed” smell.

Conclusion

As always I hope these tips help shed some light on some major misconceptions about stoner life. There is literally zero reason a stoner’s house needs to smell like anything, so, no more excuses people. Just chill out and smoke your damn herb and stop pretending it’s the most significant and important thing to ever happen in the house. It ain’t.

As a mom to four kids under 10, The Stoner Mom knows something about keeping house. Today she explains how to smoke weed without the smell.